Posts Tagged ‘relationships’
Chp 8: Stuff Happens – How do you spell relief
How Do You Spell Relief? Whether the issues that you face in your marriage are a result of his job or relational differences or other outside pressures, there is a likelihood that at some point you will want to give up. Even the best marriages have occasional long winter seasons, and we are human. For…
Read MoreChp 8: Stuff Happens. When Hard Times Come
It isn’t a matter of if, it’s a matter of when. Stress can create police marriage problems but you can be prepared. Because my husband has PTSD from his deployment to Iraq, the Fourth of July is now about renting loud movies, closing all the windows and blinds or praying that he gets called into…
Read MoreChp 7: Your Support System – Rules of Interacting with Other Wives part 2
Last week’s blog has some tips on helping you have a support system with other police wives. Here are some more rules of engagement for you. Rule Number Three: They Are One, Not Two Rose’s husband is a deputy with a nearby county sheriff’s department. She was recounting to me how the office had experienced…
Read MoreChp 7: Your Support System-But Girls are Mean
You need a support system, but can you trust women? I ran into an acquaintance recently who I hadn’t seen in a while. We quickly caught each other up on our families, and she mentioned that her nine-year-old daughter was giving her fits. I nodded, knowingly. “That’s when their hormones start up,” I shared. “I…
Read MoreChp 6: Short vs. Long Term Thinking-The Whole You
I’ve talked about motivation, foundations, problems, and trust. These are some deep parts of yourself you may never have thought about in this context. But I come back to them because it is so important to know who you are. When we know who we are, then we are much better equipped to deal with…
Read MoreChp 6: Short v. Long Term Thinking-Emotional Baggage
When I Moved In, I Brought My Baggage Jim and Angie sat across from us, their meals barely touched. They recounted an issue that they couldn’t get past in their marriage, and it was huge. They were so concerned that they brought it to Brent and I, their mentors, to help them sort it out.…
Read MoreChp 6: Short v. Long Term Thinking
Short-Term vs. Long-Term Thinking Pursuing happiness is short-term thinking. It concentrates on right now. Right now I’d be very happy if I had a big piece of German chocolate cake. And then after I eat that very large piece of German chocolate cake, I’d be happy if I had just a little more. So I’ll…
Read MoreChp 6: Thick Skin, Soft Heart: How To Deal Emotionally
I don’t wear the badge on a uniform. But when you’re married to an officer, you wear the shadow of their badge on your heart. Pat, wife of a CHP officer who was injured on-duty Worrying is carrying tomorrow’s load with today’s strength—carrying two days at once. It is moving into tomorrow ahead of time.…
Read MoreCh. 4: Code Four Communication-Selfishness v. Listening to Understand
Selfishness vs. Listen with the Desire To Understand This last communication killer is so common it’s actually part of our culture. We’re encouraged to look out for ourselves, to be self-focused. We’re also naturally inclined to respond to our own desires, feelings, and whims. We’ve been doing it since we could breathe. Maturity comes when…
Read MoreAuthenticity
When my book first came out and my friends and family members read it, a frequent observation was, “Wow, you really put a lot of personal stuff in there. Has Chief read it?” Are you kidding?! Of course Chief read it! He went through it with a fine-tooth comb. And he gave me feedback –…
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